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Family safety guide

Safety Planning for Children and Pets

Age-appropriate, non-blaming ways to include children and animals in a domestic violence safety plan.

Children need simple, reassuring plans

Children are never responsible for stopping violence or protecting an adult. Teach them that their job is to move toward safety, not physically intervene. Use plain language suited to their age and repeat that the abuse is not their fault.

  • Choose a room, neighbor, or trusted adult they can go to
  • Practice how to call 911 and state their name and location when appropriate
  • Create a code word for leaving or getting help
  • Tell school or childcare staff only what they need to support safety
  • Avoid asking children to keep secrets that place emotional responsibility on them

Plan for pets without increasing risk

Abusive partners may threaten, harm, hide, or use animals to control family members. Ask local domestic violence programs about pet-friendly shelters, foster programs, veterinary assistance, or confidential boarding.

  • Gather vaccination and ownership records when safe
  • Pack medication, a carrier, leash, food, and an identifying photo
  • Avoid leaving a pet with someone whose address is known to the abusive person
  • Ask an advocate how pets may be addressed in local protection orders

Support after a frightening event

Children may show fear, anger, sleep changes, withdrawal, clinginess, or difficulty at school. Predictable routines and calm, honest reassurance can help. A pediatrician or trauma-informed counselor can assess individual needs without blaming the child or survivor.