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For friends and family

How to Support a Friend

Practical, respectful ways to support someone experiencing relationship abuse.

Listen without taking over

Say what you have noticed, express care, and listen. Avoid demanding that someone leave, criticizing their partner in a way that could shut down conversation, or asking why they stayed. Abuse often limits choice; support should help restore it.

  • Believe them and thank them for trusting you
  • Ask what would feel helpful today
  • Respect privacy unless there is an immediate safety emergency
  • Offer specific help such as transportation, childcare, document storage, or a safe phone
  • Learn local resources before a crisis

Keep the door open

A survivor may return to a relationship, stop responding, or make choices you would not make. Continue offering steady, nonjudgmental contact when safe. Isolation benefits the abusive person; respectful connection can protect hope.

Take care of yourself

Supporting someone through danger can be frightening and exhausting. Do not confront the abusive person or place yourself in danger. An advocate can also help friends and family think through safe ways to offer support.